Today in class, I reviewed and revised my paper. I went through and weeded out the unnecessary sentences and details throughout my paper. I took into account all of the feedback I have been provided with. Seeing this allowed me to understand my weaker areas in writing. I struggle with creating a strong thesis, as well as the usage of second person. I need to provide more in depth, researched facts in the final draft. After creating a stronger thesis, I plan to reflect each paragraph back to the thesis, stating my argument. After a lot of editing, I hope to come out with a stronger and more effective essay.
Weasel words are a safe way for ad creators to positively reinforce their product. These words seem to reassure buyers that the product is the best quality available. Words such as “help”, “improve”, and “virtually” allow customers to feel comfortable using the product, although it may not necessarily be an accurate statement. An example of weasel words being put into action in an everyday ad would be the Cascade dish detergent advertisement I have attached below. The company claims it makes dishes “virtually spotless”. “Virtually” is a perfect weasel word because it appeals to customers because everyone wants their dishes to look clean. It is safe because although it makes them virtually clean, it does not necessarily mean they are actually clean.
Alignment- The ad contains many examples of alignment. The containers of Lysol are strategically placed to advertise the product and allow customers to become familiar with the product. They made the bacteria big so readers and customers can grow aware of the problem at hand and still directly relate them to the Lysol.
Proximity- The creator of this ad broke up different points being made with the help of borders. The header is primarily there to state a fact and capture readers attention. This is because it presents readers with a problem considering it is the first thing people read. Customers and readers will have to continue reading in order to solve the problem that concerns many parents. Contrast-This ad does not seem to have a particular color scheme. They do use cooler colors to make the young girl appear innocent and almost as though she is a victim of these bacteria. Repetition- The product of Lysol is being repeated on both containers as well as down in the bottom left. Having repetition allows customers to become familiar with the name and look of the product. I have had countless struggles with my writing throughout the semester. My biggest struggles have been writing an outline, as well as breaking down my writing into different times. I have a tendency to type an entire paper in one sitting, although I know that is an unsuccessful way to go about it. My writing becomes duller and less specific the longer the essay. I need to work on this. With my outlining, I have always had a difficult time with this. I never seem to follow the original outlining as well as I’d hoped. An area that has helped me a lot though my writing process is first drafts. Having multiple drafts that are to be edited prior to my final draft allows me to see which opinions and angles to take and pursue in my writing. Even if I simply send a draft to my mom or a friend, it always helps to have other opinions on my papers before fully completing it.
Original:
The special effects used during this film is unlike anything people have seen before at this point in filmmaking. From realistic explosions, to high quality filming of chases and fights, these effects transported viewers from the movie theater seats into the chill inducing city of Gotham. The realistic effects cause the audience to leave the theater feeling as though they actually rode along with the characters throughout the film. After SIEL: The special effects used during this film is unlike anything people have seen before at this point in filmmaking. From realistic explosions, to high quality filming of chases and fights, these effects transported viewers from the movie theater seats into the chill inducing city of Gotham. As the joker blew up the building towards the end of the film, the authenticity was so chilling that it deceived the audience into believing they were actually in the city of Gotham. The realistic effects cause the audience to leave the theater feeling as though they actually rode along with the Batman and The Joker throughout the film. Emmy, Ferrell and I took the category “humor” to define and focus on. Humor is the quality of being entertained and amused. This show, Daria, did not display conventional forms of comedy. It used dry, satirical, and sarcastic humor. After watching the show, the definition of humor was altered for me because it allowed me to see different types of humor. This show is a more alternative form of comedy. Many of the jokes are outdated. It manages to get the point across in a humorous way, while still being relatable.
I have been stereotyped many times due to the color of my hair. I have dealt with the “dumb blonde” jokes since elementary school. Being short, blonde, and a cheerleader, I was the perfect candidate for the ridicule. Thinking the offensive and demeaning comments stopped with the students at school, I didn’t think too much about it. It wasn’t until I had these remarks thrown at me by two different teachers, one my 7th grade year and the other my 8th grade year. Granted my ADHD prohibited me from succeeding immensely in school, but that was no reason to discourage a girl who was trying her hardest simply due to her hair color.
When sending a professional email, it is important to speak in such a way that the reader knows that you see them as a superior. After giving the email a subject, you then starting the body with a proper introduction, one must type “Dear ….”, using their correct title as well. The paragraphs should be rich in detail, yet concise and to the point. This allows the recipient to understand the purpose of the email, yet it doesn’t draw everything out, making it difficult to follow. After including supporting details and intriguing information, it is time to the end with a polite conclusion and signature. Mention phrases like “Hope to hear from you soon” or “Thank you for your time”, even “Have a great day!” will suffice. Sign your name, including a number to reach your, as well as an alternative email.
The movie I have chosen is Frozen. Personally, I believe this movie is on its way to becoming a classic one day. I had hardly any negative feelings towards this movie until reading a few negative reviews on Rotten Tomatoes that I truly began to see the errors that occurred throughout the film. A common disappointment shared amongst the critics was the fact that it was a “conservative Disney film”(Damien Straker, Impulse Gamer). This left many critics bored and unamused. Other critics considered it appealing to many ages and claim it “succeeds because of it’s great story and it's catchy musical numbers”(Matthew Toomey, ABC Radio Brisbane). I understand where both critics are coming from, considering it is both similar and different from other, more stereotypical Disney princess movies. Overall though, I would have to agree with the positive reviews considering it has a phenomenal soundtrack as well as an entertaining storyline.
The writing process consists of steps to help one write on a topic. It is a simple five step process which includes prewriting, first draft, revision, proof reading, and final draft. Breaking down your writing into these five steps helps you effectively create a proper paper. Viewing all of your information laid out in front of you helps many writers string their writing together. Prewriting helps realize what is necessary and unnecessary to include in your writing. Personally, I have not used the writing process many times in my writing history. I find it overwhelms me, trying to follow a strict brainstorming format. It is very apparent as to why people follow this process, but my ADHD mind does not work with it. After reading over the textbook, I have found many tips to help with my prewriting that better suits my learning and thought process. Hopefully doing this will allow me to take advantage of the help that comes from prewriting.
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AuthorBrantley Shields Archives
October 2015
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